It's changing that's admirable. It's really hard to do. [he takes a moment with that, before nodding to himself.] I've seen a lot of people who would keep thinking they're right for a long time, just to avoid feeling bad about it. You didn't. I guess that's what I mean.
[and boy, that's heavy but he kind of gets it. not in this scale, but he nods again, eyes sinking down.]
It does. Um. I was lucky. Really lucky. Once people wanted to hurt me and my brother, and our friend. They weren't going to let us leave, they wanted to kill us. For a little bit I thought I'd have to to fight them to save us. That I'd have to not care about if they lived or died, if I wanted us to live.
But my master stopped me. He took care of things, but before he did he told me not to do it because it'd hurt me. That fighting people like that, having to hurt them like that, would really hurt me and I shouldn't have to do that or hurt like that.
[a beat and he looks over.] It's that kind of hurt, isn't it? What you feel. Or how it made you feel.
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branchandroot
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Date: 2023-03-07 04:13 am (UTC)[and boy, that's heavy but he kind of gets it. not in this scale, but he nods again, eyes sinking down.]
It does. Um. I was lucky. Really lucky. Once people wanted to hurt me and my brother, and our friend. They weren't going to let us leave, they wanted to kill us. For a little bit I thought I'd have to to fight them to save us. That I'd have to not care about if they lived or died, if I wanted us to live.
But my master stopped me. He took care of things, but before he did he told me not to do it because it'd hurt me. That fighting people like that, having to hurt them like that, would really hurt me and I shouldn't have to do that or hurt like that.
[a beat and he looks over.] It's that kind of hurt, isn't it? What you feel. Or how it made you feel.